You may have come to age through different huddles trying to live your life to the fullest. Life is short and each second you spend should be of use to you. Most people will spend most of their lives living other people’s lives. The earlier you realize who you are and push away all external effort to shape the life you live, the more likely you are to be happy on your death bed.
Keep in mind that everyday is full of risks to our lives. We travel, use sharp tools and interact with so many people whose motives are unknown to us. You can die anytime that’s why you should live every day like you may die the next day.
I had a friend who succumbed to his death a week ago. It was real pain to think about how he died at such a young age. I cried several times until I came to one realization. Paxon had been of use to the world during his days. He’d helped raise talent in Uganda and he helped so many other guys when he still had time. RIP Paxon, brother you went so early.
When we lose friends, we realize that we will be gone someday and we need to prepare for our own deaths. Ask yourself what would be said of you if you died tomorrow. That’s what matters. If you don’t have much to answer that question then you should reshape yourself and be who you want to be.
Your life is mostly a learning experience for you. You should be able to narrate the lessons you’ve learnt since you were born. If you can’t, you haven’t failed even once. There’s one rule that you should hold in your life.
“Everyone wants to win, but only few accept to lose”
I liked a phrase that I got from a Bollywood movie that; life is like a war, God put us on earth and we have to fight. If you take that wording as it is, you’ll be wrong. In that war, you have to learn to lose. If you don’t, you’ll be like everyone else – searching for a win.
Have you ever had someone correct you and when you realized that you were wrong, you tried to get that person to know that you were somehow right?
Have you ever argued with someone who is wrong and continued to argue even when the other person wasn’t ready to accept?
That’s all a desire to win and dominate. How do you know when that desire strikes.
How to detect the winning desire
1. Interaction
The first lessons should be from your own interactions. Look at how you are speaking with each person and search for instances where you are pulled by an inner need to win.
2. Observation
If you can kill yourself, you can kill another person. Look at other people interacting and analyse their behaviors. It’s mostly out of advice. When someone refuses to follow another person’s advice, he makes the advisor lose and because of that, most advisors will predict bad luck for those who ignored them. Something like: “I told him and he refused. He’s not going to get it”.
When you can know that someone is forcing a win on you, you can easily ignore them. It’s the same for critics. They try all they can to make you lose your standing by inflating you with negative input. You can then easily do away with them if you can know that they aren’t of any use to you.
Once you know how people live their lives, you can then decide to shape yourself. You can easily shape yourself if you can shape your future. You might be forcing yourself to live to other people’s expectations, but if you can decide on who you really want to be then you can know what to waste your time on.
The end product of inner peace
Once you have settled for who you want to be, you’ll be able to pursue your dreams with limited distraction. You know that if you can avoid distraction, you can develop focus and that will allow you accomplish very large appointments that you wouldn’t if you were stuck into dancing to the public tune.
Follow your passion. I love writing so I researched on how I could express that desire and I learnt how to blog. Again I am into computers and I tried all I could to learn how to program and make websites. I learnt that and it’s giving me something to waste time on. You should also search for yours. Let me know how you’re feeling in the comments and whether you have encountered any experience that prevented you from being you. Thanks for reading.
AUTHOR
Emmy Jayson
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